When you want to genuinely give a compliment, do it in a way that makes it special and memorable for the other person. Here are four ways you can give great and memorable compliments:
- Be Specific: I remember years ago complimenting the President of Concordia University Austin, Dr. Don Christian to his wife. I told her, “I really like Dr. Christian. He is so nice!” And she looked at me with a curious expression and asked, “what is it about him that makes him so nice?” I then realized I had given such a general compliment that it wasn’t meaningful. She wanted me to give a specific reason why I thought he was “so nice!” To do this, you can try adding the word “because” after your compliment, and then state the reason why.
- Point out something unique: Look for something you can compliment someone about that others may not notice. Many people get compliments on the same attributes frequently. Although they appreciate it, it starts to feel less special because they hear it all of the time. Look for something unique to compliment the person about, and try to base it around an intrinsic attribute or a skill rather than a physical attribute.
- Third Party Compliment: This is a fantastic way to compliment a person on so many levels! If someone tells you something nice about another person, tell that other person what they said. This is always a nice surprise, knowing they received a compliment when they were not even present. The compliment is coming through you rather than from you. You get to be the messenger of that compliment.
- Public Compliments: Praise people in public. However, be sure to not make a big deal out of it. Be aware that some shy or introverted individuals feel uncomfortable with being the center of attention. The last thing you want to do is make someone feel bad that you have complimented him. Therefore, give the compliment but move on so that the attention does not stay on that individual if they are more reserved in nature.
Do you have special types of compliments you like to give? If you do, share them in the comments!
